By Peter Chidichimo
Let’s face it: historically, mothers, and their associated holiday, have received more attention compared to Father’s Day. And why not? Mothers bond early with their newborns, especially where breastfeeding is involved, and who can compete with that? Also, mothers tend to take more time from work after giving birth and will likely play the larger role in their children’s early development. And when it comes to stay-at-home parenting, mothers win hands down.
However, let us not underestimate the role that fathers play. For example, according to Psychology Today, children with sensitive and supportive fathers achieve higher levels of social competence and better peer relationships, compared with non-supportive fathers. Children whose fathers provide learning opportunities and interact with them frequently perform better in school and have more advanced language skills. Fathers can serve in these roles even when they do not live with the child.
Recent research has shifted from how father absence might affect a child’s development, to the potential effects of proximate father involvement.
For example, children who have regular, positive contact with their father tend to regulate their emotions better than children who have no contact with their father. If no father is involved, other caregivers can step in and serve those important functions. Family structure is less important than having loving caregivers meet children’s physical, cognitive, emotional, and social needs.
Based on the above research, countries such as Norway and Sweden are endeavoring to encourage fathers and mothers equally in caregiving, by providing paternal as well as maternal leave. In general, it appears that in many countries, gender roles have become more equitable over time, and research now suggests that fathers play many important roles in child development. Such benefits include a child’s social adjustment, academic performance, and emotional maturity.
Parental Relationship
The parental relationship is also very important. Conflict between parents is detrimental to a child’s well-being, especially if the conflict is hostile and unresolved. Supportive co-parenting relationships, by contrast, are associated with better social adaptation and fewer behavior problems in children. Families function as “entire systems,” not just as isolated parent-child dyads.
The important thing here is parental contribution, with each parent contributing equally to a child’s well-being in different ways.
Regardless of family structure, children need to have their physical needs met, but also require cognitive stimulation, and the need to feel loved and accepted. If a father or mother is not involved in the child’s life, another caregiver can serve these critical roles, but it is important for all caregivers to have support in their respective roles. This support can come from a child’s other parent, extended family, friends, or others.
According to the Institute for Research on Poverty, not only have we seen changes in the typical American family, but changes in the definition of “father” as well. Among the 72 million fathers in the United States today, there are biological fathers and stepfathers, but also men who serve in a less traditional legal or social role. Family structure can range from marriage, to cohabitation, to single parenting.
Further research demonstrates involved fathers are associated with positive effects on their children even before birth. During pregnancy, partner support is associated with fewer maternal health problems and more positive maternal and infant outcomes than among women who lack a supportive partner. A father’s supportive (or abusive) behavior can influence maternal attachment to their baby, and the quality of the partner relationship often predicts how both parents will respond to the needs of their child.
In numerous studies, positive father involvement is associated with children’s higher academic achievement, including stronger math and verbal skills. Socially, findings indicate greater emotional security, higher self-esteem, fewer behavioral problems, and greater social competence than among children who do not have caring, involved fathers. Again, the father role can be traditional or non-traditional.
Non-Resident Dads
Given the decline of marriage, increase in divorce rates, and growth of nonmarital childbearing over the past half-century, many biological fathers don’t live with their children, which can reduce contact. Nevertheless, nonresident dads who have a successful coparenting relationship with their children’s mother tend to be more involved in their children’s lives. Conversely, numerous studies indicate that father absence can have negative effects on their children’s well-being. One study also found that women who had an involved father in childhood experienced fewer psychological problems as young adults than women who did not.
According to the Children’s Bureau, in early development, the relationship between the child and father can be equally as important as the child’s relationship with the mother. Early father involvement is related to positive health outcomes in infants, such as improved weight gain in preterm infants and improved breastfeeding rates.
Conversely, the absence of an involved father figure hinders development from early infancy throughout childhood and into adulthood. Unfortunately, there are psychological effects of the absence of a father figure for children that will persist through adulthood and beyond.
Gender-Specific Benefits
It may be tempting to assume the father role has more of an impact on the development of boys versus girls, but actually that isn’t the case. The involvement of a father figure has unique and proven impacts on both sexes. In young boys, father engagement reduces the frequency of behavioral problems, while also decreasing delinquency and economic disadvantage in low-income families. For girls and young women, father engagement reduces psychological problems and the likelihood of depression.
While mothers are widely associated with nurturance and protection, there is evidence that fathers tend to be more involved in physical play, and that play activity is more physical and challenging than that of mothers. Fathers often encourage their children to take risks and be independent, whereas mothers typically emphasize avoiding risk and injury. A newer area of fatherhood study examines how fathers tend to encourage children “to explore, take chances, and overcome obstacles.” Naturally, there are documented cases where mothers assume that initiative.
In an ideal situation, having both a mother and a father, or at minimum, caring and competent substitutes, assists a child in obtaining a balanced and well-rounded development, whether they are male or female. According to the Department of Health & Human Services (HHS), studies consistently show that while mothers and fathers have different styles of playing, engaging, and communicating with their children, both play unique but vital roles in a child’s healthy development.
